Which Way Do You Lean?

3 minute read

  Did you know that we all internally lean one way or another?

  It might seem that we ourselves are neutral and everybody else leans.

It is a helpful thing to realise that we are not neutral but are all the time filtering our circumstances through our own personality traits, beliefs, values, talents and experiences.

This awareness of our own leanings is emotionally intelligent.

It brings us to the table of relationship and performance situations with the knowledge of what I hold and who I am, with my strengths and weaknesses.

This awareness can also help us come into relationship with our ego in check and an openness to others.

I might come into the context of relationship with family, friends or co-workers, discussing a topic that is emotionally charged. Am I aware of what my leanings are and that I am leaning toward what my own map of the world tells me?

This also is how others will come into this context. They come with their own map of how the world is and how things work.

This intelligence to understand that we do not come into a situation in a neutral position and neither do my fellow friends, family or co- workers, leads us to need a way, to find connection. This connection helps us move forward in a positive direction, preserving the relationships and takes us to a good and productive place.

We need objectivity and the willingness to see different perspectives .

We can connect with them if we …

…listen well to the words that people use, catch the content, the feeling, understand the meaning behind their words, remove any judgement and employ empathy .

Quality communication is when we are aware of what is important to myself and important to others. Importance tells us what is of value.

Respecting what others value creates healthy boundaries and a move toward self-control and love.

In summary, we will all automatically come into relationship and lean towards what is important to us in any given situation.

Awareness of this is a great step forward in being…

…emotional intelligent.